The Random Facts meme...

I'm taking this one upon myself, as I feel a common sense of detachment from blogging, a la Hayden Childs. I have not been tagged, but this seemed like an interesting exercise in introspection - or at least a chance to talk up my brushes with fame.

1) My first meeting with anyone famous was with Bobby Short - he'd been a student at the primary school that I had attended, and he was still close friends with the principal of said school. She'd invited him to play at a school assembly at which I was named "Best Boy Citizen," so it was my privilege to get to shake this man's hand, even though I had no earthly idea who he was (other than being a formidable singer, amply demonstrated by his rendition of "White Christmas" moments before I was introduced to him). To my 5th grade mind, this was all but a matter of course. Now, I would have truly appreciated the opportunity.

2) I think every male of the human species remembers when he was first smacked, flicked, kneed, swatted, punched or had otherwise had his genitals violently treated. Mine was during same 5th grade year, when I was a member of the Triple-A Safety Patrol. I don't know what the big deal was, but it was supposed to be some sort of honor to be chosen to arrive super-extra early and to don a reflective orange belt, for the sole purpose of blocking traffic while other students used the crosswalk. I was at the corner of English and Gilbert in Danville, IL and another member of the Elite Traffic Squad put hands on my shoulders and raised his knee square into my crotch. I don't remember what I said to him to precipitate this sequence of events, but I do remember the shuddering pain - as well as the black bruise on my glans. Yeee. Ouch.

3) My first big rock concert was seeing Hall & Oates on the Big Bam Boom tour. General Public was the opening act, and I had traveled to Tulsa, OK to see this show. I think I was the only person who came away more impressed with General Public than the main act. To this day, of everyone involved in that tour, I would have loved to have met Dave Wakeling.

4) My biggest fear is needles. I suppose that this qualifies as "white coat syndrome," but as the 5th grade seems to inform most of my adult life today, I had received a measles booster in school. I remember really having a lot of anxiety about it, and when I finally got to the front of the line to get the shot in my left arm, I vaguely recall thinking, "Gee, that wasn't so bad." From what I recall, I was able to walk from the basement of the school all the way back into my afternoon class before I was completely overcome by swirling black & yellow spots. I remember the look of my canvas shoes and being asked, "Where are you going?" before passing out cold. I hold the scent of smelling salts in my nose to this day - and I still can't get so much as a finger prick before displaying signs of shock. I can't even watch other people being poked or prodded, and seeing an IV is about enough to send me back on my heels. I pray I never develop insulin-dependent Type I diabetes.

5) If I could do any single one thing, irrespective of my physical condition, it would probably be to trek from Lukla along the Dudh Khosi to the south-route Everest Base Camp on the Khumbu Glacier. No matter how many times I see stuff about Everest expeditions, I am always enthralled by the stories of the people who choose to put their lives on the line for a chance at the summit. Perhaps George Leigh Mallory was onto something when he quipped, "Because it's there." Now, I wouldn't ever dream of climbing the mountain itself - I think that would be absolutely beyond my ability or ambitions... but I'd at least like to see the sumbitch up close, and with my own eyes, and on the power of my own two feet. (After the bout of altitude sickness I had at 10,000 feet this summer, I think that's about all the ambition that my alveoli can handle.) And if I could ever meet David Breashears or Ed Viesturs or Jon Krakauer or Jamling Tenzing Norgay or Araceli Segarra or Sir Edmund Hillary, well, I'd about be overcome. Fat chance of meeting them here in the relative flatlands.

6) I get a lot of compliments from total strangers about my hair. Right now, it's a mess of salt-&-pepper curl, and it hardly reaches my collar. Think Help!-era John Lennon with a Jew-fro. I am, however, not Jewish - and I had stick-straight hair growing up. I kinda don't get what the fuss is about, but the positive reinforcement has me holding off a wig-busting for the time being. I've long wondered how I would look with longer hair, although I still think that it's more likely that I'll wind up looking like Buddy Miles rather than Eddie Vedder.

7) I met the governor of Tennessee - Phil Bredesen - at a local McDonald's. I was sorely tempted to deal him a cockpunch. Sorta like an inverse meaning of "shaking hands with the governor."

8) The most wealthy person I've ever eyeballed at an arms' length is Rupert Murdoch. I had been working for this little startup company called America Online as a temp, and he'd come to this little corner of the Chicago Tribune tower to see these piddling things called The Internets. His cologne bore the faintest strain of sulfur.